Do You Ever Feel You Don't Measure Up?
I sure do. I mean, I see all these women online who have it all, or succeed at stuff I want to succeed at, and to be honest, here I am pregnant and scatter-brained, trying to adjust to having a traveling husband, and beating myself up for not getting my writing done!
I mean, instead of looking at the things we do well, it is so easy to skim our favorite social media site and start comparing ourselves to what we see.
Comparison is Not New
And neither is beating yourself up over not being as awesome as you think someone else is!
Let's jump back to the Apostle Peter for a moment, shall we? Peter has denied Jesus not once, not twice, but three times. Think 'ole Pete might have been beating himself up about that? Do you think he might just have been comparing himself to the other guys?
Ahem, YES! In fact, Pete decides he's such a failure compared to the other apostles that he may as well call it quits and go back to fishing. When the risen Jesus shows up on the beach and makes breakfast for the guys, Peter is totally thrilled to see Him, but after that first joy, he goes right back to beating himself up.
So what does the Good Lord do? He takes Peter for a walk! Jesus takes Peter away from all the people Pete has been comparing himself to, and He has a good heart-to-heart with him.
And What Does He Ask Peter to Do?
What noble deed does this King assign to Peter, for Peter to prove his love and loyalty? Is he sent on a great quest? A holy war? End poverty?
Nope. Jesus tells him to feed His sheep. Tend His lambs. Seriously. That's it.
We tell God we want to do something big and noble for Him, like publish awesome books or encourage ten bazillion people with our amazing Instagram feeds.
And this King of all Kings whispers back, Want to do something really big and noble for Me? Well, have I got a job for you! Tend My lambs...
At this point, for me personally, my heart was much like Peter's. My answer went something like this: "Lord! You know I love you... I really could do something bigger."
And that's when the King nods with excitement and points at the lambs gathered around my kitchen table. Yes, Dear Heart! Much bigger than books and blogs and bank accounts! Bigger than all that stuff! Much, much bigger!
Aspire to live quietly*! Mind your own life! Work with your hands! (1 Thess. 4:11) Teach these lambs about Me. Walk them up to the very throne of My Father! Show them how to live for Me in this life! Tend them, feed them, shepherd them!
*Live Quietly: *Hesychazo (G2270): to lead a quiet life, said of those who are not running hither and thither, but stay at home and mind their business
The next time you are feeling tossed about, wondering why your efforts to succeed are falling flat, I encourage you to take a walk with the King. Remember that His ways are not our ways. His idea of big and noble is not ours.
He just might tell you to fix your eyes on something a lot more simple. He just might tell you to live quietly. He just might tell you tend your lambs.
But you know what? Peter did just that. And thousands of years later, most of us consider 'ole Pete to be a pretty big success.
I really wanted to share this post with you, because I have felt a drawing in to home and hearth and my lambs this year. I haven't given up on The Milana Legends, or my other writing projects, but I have decided that Lamb Tending is my Number One priority. This means I'm not sure how long it will take me to edit the next book, especially with baby number five coming soon.
I hope you understand. AT
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